Dear So and So ... tired, pissed off, broke, tired

Dear upstairs, disrespectful neighbors from hell,

Please STOP letting YOUR toddler run, jump, stomp all over the house at 8AM on a SATURDAY/SUNDAY MORNING! Please STOP letting YOUR toddler throw and bounce his toys over and over on the kitchen floor. MY kids and I have to get up at 6:30am M-F and we'd like to sleep in on the weekends instead of being woken up by YOUR kid.

Signed, Your downstairs, sleep-deprived neighbors

Dear Gateway Computers,

I am really enjoying my brand-new computer that I waited forever for/saved up for ~ that refuses to acknowledge my wireless signal, forcing me to be attached to an Ethernet cord AND a USB cord attached to my new, WIRELESS printer that I bought because I didn't want to be attached to a printer. Finally, thank you for forcing me to be attached to a power out-let because the battery refuses to lock and if the computer isn't plugged in to a power source; it turns off.

Signed,

Should have bought a Dell

Dear Deadbeat Dad,

You haven't voluntarily sent a dime for your children's support in over THREE years. I guess your think they haven't needed anything? Thats a good thing! If they had really needed something it would have really interfered with your gambling & drinking money!

Signed,

Your childrens (remember them?) Mother

Dear Felicity,

You are so adorable and I love you to death but can you please stop putting your nose on my nose, staring at my face and purring loud enough for the neighbors to hear, while I'm asleep? Could you also stop patting your paw on my face for attention in the middle of the night? I know you miss your Mommy but she visits you often and I promise, if you stop batting my face in the middle of the night, I will pet you and give you treats in the morning!

Love,

Auntie/Foster Mommy